Your Smile Brings Light Into My Days
The Tought Of You ,Warms My Night
To Hold You In My Arms ,
Even In My Dreams It Feels So Right
Loving You
You Never See The Way I Look Into Your
Eyes
You Never Realize The Love I Feel
Inside
Pain And Sorrow That Haunted Me ,
Cause Words I've Left Unsaid To You
Now You Found Someone Else To Love
Deep In My Heart, My Love Won't Fade Away
To Hold U In My Arms
Even In My Dreams It Feels So Right Loving You
---------------------------------------------------------------
Friday, August 28, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Crash & Burn 2009
What can be said to be the most embarrassing moment in my life?? The answer could be on 17th August 2009, the day where i'm supposed to feel honoured carrying the flag to the pole and taking it back to the box and keep it safe for next year celebration. What supposed to be the most successful day and the time where i can feel proud with myself turned out to be the most disasterous day ever and the most humiliating moment in my life. Let me start this crash and burn day....
As all the Indonesian ppl knw,on the 17th of August is the day where all Indonesian will feel proud with how they achieve their independence because on that day it is Indonesian Independence Day. To start the story,let me describe about the nite before the big day...
All of us(paskibra unit)are having sumwhat like slumber party as we are trying to avoid lateness n etc,so we decided to crash at the ambassy's house. We are trying so hard to sleep but to be honest we are helplessly successful in doing that. This year,paskibra unit are conclusive of young teenagers and matured teens. The young teens here couldn't sleep at all. They constantly wake up so ended up they laugh and play all nite long,not having sleep at all. From this moment i know some of this brats are going to create some havoc during the Big Day and my instinct was right. Although my fren and I myself are having that problem we are trying our best to sleep tho.
When the Big Day rises it sunshine everybody was already ready to set the day and make it a major history for our ownself and for the KJRI Penang also. Few of those paskibra unit who didn't join the sleep over came just in time to make up themself and be prepared....and here it goes.
The time has come for us to go out to the battlefield and used all the strategy that was trained to us by our most beloved trainers where they teaches us with patient and sweat. We make a heading to the battlefield with fast heartbeating,nervousness and stomachache. It was not to hot nor cold,just nice weather. Its time for us to make a move after one of our most beloved trainer who are leading the opening day entered the field. We make quite a good move first and i was happy and proud for a second. I was very nervous to take the honoured flag but i bravely take it with dignity and honour tho to be honest i am a Malaysian(im semi Malaysia & Indonesia, hehe). After we reach to the pole its time for me to give the honoured flag to my comrade who has been practicing not to laugh when giving the flag. Suddenly...i heard one of the comrade saying the name of one of the sick comrade and i was kinda worried at that time and my restlessness strikes my head. I know for a second that someone is going to faint and she does. Luckily she was being helped before she flat out on the field. But it makes me sad a bit to be honest. We continue everything and at that time everything went well. We went back to our 1st base where we landed our feet in the battlefield itself. When i thought everything is going to be ok something went wrong again. I heard a hard thump behind my line and at that time i know for sure one more person has lost the battle and the person who lost the battle is the person whom i had advised the nite before the Big Day to go get some rest. I was frustrated at that time,somemore listening to what those TKI was talking about us. Beside fainting nothing gone wrong during the raising the honoured flag moment.
Now the most saddest part came....
Its the time where we suppose to raised down the honoured flag and bring it back to its resting place and honoured it for the last time. It was a bit touché a bit because on that evening it was raining and our battlefield has become like an ugly football field or less worst than a padi field. We was informed that we are having a special guess from Aceh and we really have to make KJRI Penang feel proud by showing this guess what we have been trained for all this while. We make a footing at the same base like morning and waiting for another beloved trainer to enter the field and lead us. He came in and we are prepared,no more fainting this time we said. Everything went quite well first and then the 1st disaster started...One of our comrade shoes lose out coz it has been stepped by one of the comrade behing her,accidentally stepped and she stopped for a while to insert her leg inside her shoes back. I almost laugh but more to feel frustrate a bit. And its time to raise down the honoured flag and again when everything was supposed to be smooth sailing something went wrong. This time its the worst of all when the flag we are raising down can't be raised down! That is the worst of all!!! I considered myself as dead at that time. The song already half way and i can see my comrade are struggling to raised down the flag but they can't. I pity them a lot coz we are part of the team and whatever happened to one of the comrade the whole unit can feel it too. Then our most beloved trainer/leader for the closing ceremony came out and saved the day where at that time we can already see and feel how frustrated he is with all of us. We go back to the base hoping everything went well but again our marching are not the same a.k.a legs. This is due to our own fault.
After all finish,we are called to gathered around and was approached by the beloved trainer who saved our day and he scolded us and i think among all the words he said,the saddest would be the time he said "all the training we have been through was useless". I think that is the time where i can really feel how frustrated he is with the unit. He then leave us just like that,i guess he was just trying to calm himself down coz we know he usually not like that kind of person. Then we were called again by another beloved trainer where he gave us some +ve words to sooth our feelings a bit after we had lost the 'war' just now. At that time one of my comrade already cried and it tears me a bit. We all then shake hands with the beloved trainer and moved on to the field again as its time to take photos. Before photo moments we were approached by the most beloved trainer who really gave us lots of positive words tho we already know it has no effect at all to us. After photo moment we were called by beloved trainer who saved the day and he looks a bit calm down at that time. He then ask us to sit down and cool down for a sec and its time for him to have some slow talk with us. It was at that time most of the paskibra unit cried when he talks coz we know we really dissapoint him,somemore this year and this month was his last month in Penang,Malaysia. I tried my best not to cry but it was a helpless moment for me. I already started crying the time i took photos with him and tho he tries to calm me down he can't do nothing,not much help. I feel the pain,the pain of teaching someone to do something but end up down in the drain. Tapping my head wont give much help just make it worst. The most saddest part that he said would be that "your names will always be remembered for the rest of my life". That moment who are you kidding with,i cried like a little baby,just couldnt help myself. He actually almost cried but a tough army like him wont cry FOR SURE!
So,basically that was the thing that happened on the day where we thought suppose to be the most honourable and remembered day tho it will be remembered esp the one where the flag can't be raised down(it was technical problem to be honest). So again I felt that it was appropriate for me to apologize to them lots of lots of time. May our trainer Pak Rohman, Pak Hanafi, Pak Ayep and Pak Bayu forgive us.
-crash and burn-
paskibra 2009
As all the Indonesian ppl knw,on the 17th of August is the day where all Indonesian will feel proud with how they achieve their independence because on that day it is Indonesian Independence Day. To start the story,let me describe about the nite before the big day...
All of us(paskibra unit)are having sumwhat like slumber party as we are trying to avoid lateness n etc,so we decided to crash at the ambassy's house. We are trying so hard to sleep but to be honest we are helplessly successful in doing that. This year,paskibra unit are conclusive of young teenagers and matured teens. The young teens here couldn't sleep at all. They constantly wake up so ended up they laugh and play all nite long,not having sleep at all. From this moment i know some of this brats are going to create some havoc during the Big Day and my instinct was right. Although my fren and I myself are having that problem we are trying our best to sleep tho.
When the Big Day rises it sunshine everybody was already ready to set the day and make it a major history for our ownself and for the KJRI Penang also. Few of those paskibra unit who didn't join the sleep over came just in time to make up themself and be prepared....and here it goes.
The time has come for us to go out to the battlefield and used all the strategy that was trained to us by our most beloved trainers where they teaches us with patient and sweat. We make a heading to the battlefield with fast heartbeating,nervousness and stomachache. It was not to hot nor cold,just nice weather. Its time for us to make a move after one of our most beloved trainer who are leading the opening day entered the field. We make quite a good move first and i was happy and proud for a second. I was very nervous to take the honoured flag but i bravely take it with dignity and honour tho to be honest i am a Malaysian(im semi Malaysia & Indonesia, hehe). After we reach to the pole its time for me to give the honoured flag to my comrade who has been practicing not to laugh when giving the flag. Suddenly...i heard one of the comrade saying the name of one of the sick comrade and i was kinda worried at that time and my restlessness strikes my head. I know for a second that someone is going to faint and she does. Luckily she was being helped before she flat out on the field. But it makes me sad a bit to be honest. We continue everything and at that time everything went well. We went back to our 1st base where we landed our feet in the battlefield itself. When i thought everything is going to be ok something went wrong again. I heard a hard thump behind my line and at that time i know for sure one more person has lost the battle and the person who lost the battle is the person whom i had advised the nite before the Big Day to go get some rest. I was frustrated at that time,somemore listening to what those TKI was talking about us. Beside fainting nothing gone wrong during the raising the honoured flag moment.
Now the most saddest part came....
Its the time where we suppose to raised down the honoured flag and bring it back to its resting place and honoured it for the last time. It was a bit touché a bit because on that evening it was raining and our battlefield has become like an ugly football field or less worst than a padi field. We was informed that we are having a special guess from Aceh and we really have to make KJRI Penang feel proud by showing this guess what we have been trained for all this while. We make a footing at the same base like morning and waiting for another beloved trainer to enter the field and lead us. He came in and we are prepared,no more fainting this time we said. Everything went quite well first and then the 1st disaster started...One of our comrade shoes lose out coz it has been stepped by one of the comrade behing her,accidentally stepped and she stopped for a while to insert her leg inside her shoes back. I almost laugh but more to feel frustrate a bit. And its time to raise down the honoured flag and again when everything was supposed to be smooth sailing something went wrong. This time its the worst of all when the flag we are raising down can't be raised down! That is the worst of all!!! I considered myself as dead at that time. The song already half way and i can see my comrade are struggling to raised down the flag but they can't. I pity them a lot coz we are part of the team and whatever happened to one of the comrade the whole unit can feel it too. Then our most beloved trainer/leader for the closing ceremony came out and saved the day where at that time we can already see and feel how frustrated he is with all of us. We go back to the base hoping everything went well but again our marching are not the same a.k.a legs. This is due to our own fault.
After all finish,we are called to gathered around and was approached by the beloved trainer who saved our day and he scolded us and i think among all the words he said,the saddest would be the time he said "all the training we have been through was useless". I think that is the time where i can really feel how frustrated he is with the unit. He then leave us just like that,i guess he was just trying to calm himself down coz we know he usually not like that kind of person. Then we were called again by another beloved trainer where he gave us some +ve words to sooth our feelings a bit after we had lost the 'war' just now. At that time one of my comrade already cried and it tears me a bit. We all then shake hands with the beloved trainer and moved on to the field again as its time to take photos. Before photo moments we were approached by the most beloved trainer who really gave us lots of positive words tho we already know it has no effect at all to us. After photo moment we were called by beloved trainer who saved the day and he looks a bit calm down at that time. He then ask us to sit down and cool down for a sec and its time for him to have some slow talk with us. It was at that time most of the paskibra unit cried when he talks coz we know we really dissapoint him,somemore this year and this month was his last month in Penang,Malaysia. I tried my best not to cry but it was a helpless moment for me. I already started crying the time i took photos with him and tho he tries to calm me down he can't do nothing,not much help. I feel the pain,the pain of teaching someone to do something but end up down in the drain. Tapping my head wont give much help just make it worst. The most saddest part that he said would be that "your names will always be remembered for the rest of my life". That moment who are you kidding with,i cried like a little baby,just couldnt help myself. He actually almost cried but a tough army like him wont cry FOR SURE!
So,basically that was the thing that happened on the day where we thought suppose to be the most honourable and remembered day tho it will be remembered esp the one where the flag can't be raised down(it was technical problem to be honest). So again I felt that it was appropriate for me to apologize to them lots of lots of time. May our trainer Pak Rohman, Pak Hanafi, Pak Ayep and Pak Bayu forgive us.
-crash and burn-
paskibra 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
The Chronicles of the Peridot
Empty bottle Empty space
Where it goes it can't be trace
The wind chime the bells of trees
And it echoes through the air
Breathing the ocean
Listening to the song of the shore,
The sun strikes thee
Nor love or loathe
Just plain empty space,
Floating like a zombie
Did not realize the tornado inside
It spins not knowing when to stop
It tries not to be pointless,
The final spin land its burden
Clearing the air of dust
With a bit of lust
Listening to the cupid sing
Trying to find the cupid's arrow
Lost it in its shadow,
Never gives up Never surrender
Determination of the peridot will rule them all.
Where it goes it can't be trace
The wind chime the bells of trees
And it echoes through the air
Breathing the ocean
Listening to the song of the shore,
The sun strikes thee
Nor love or loathe
Just plain empty space,
Floating like a zombie
Did not realize the tornado inside
It spins not knowing when to stop
It tries not to be pointless,
The final spin land its burden
Clearing the air of dust
With a bit of lust
Listening to the cupid sing
Trying to find the cupid's arrow
Lost it in its shadow,
Never gives up Never surrender
Determination of the peridot will rule them all.
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